Same-sex couples have a huge amount of creative freedom with their wedding day. One of the best things about a gay wedding is that you can do away with stuffy conventional wedding roles and customs, and make the day truly your own.
It can be confusing at a gay or lesbian wedding to know what parts of the traditional marriage ceremony to keep. Who should walk down the aisle first? What roles do our parents have? Will we want a best man and ushers or maid of honour and bridesmaids?
Image: Pinterest. As several same-sex couples have told us, the risk is that you both end up planning to propose at the same time! When the time feels right, either of you can pop the question. The terms best man and maid of honour are totally optional too, of course. Both bridesmaids and ushers host tables at the wedding breakfast. Most brides and grooms have ditched the tackier stag and hen aspects now, like strippers and fancy dress, so right from the start you can cross those off!
Ultimately, whatever is the kind of night that means the most fun to you, do it.
Same-Sex Marriages, 10 Years Later
Two suits? Two dresses? One of each? Wear whatever you like! This makes for some great getting ready photos. In a same-sex ceremony, there are lots of twists on this to suit each couple and their circumstances.
This tradition used to be a transferal of ownership from father to husband and has a patriarchal history that you may reject.
The symbolism behind being given away does not need to be traditional though — many people see it as a way of parents giving their blessing to the marriage and a happy, loving gesture. It is customary for the bride to stand on the left side of the altar and the groom on the right from the days when a groom would need his right fighting hand free to defend his bride from other suitors.So, what happens to a marriage over the course of 10 years? Make that a gay marriage.
On May 23,The New York Times printed 41 wedding announcements that included 5 same-sex couples, the first legal gay marriages to appear in these pages. Earlier that week, Massachusetts had become the first state to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. So, where are those first five couples now? Three live in Massachusetts, one moved from Boston to Washington, D. They have a total of five children, with three born in wedlock. The men and women involved are now 41 to 58 years old.
And how did a marriage license change their lives? Some couples talked about how it made everyday headaches like tax and insurance forms go away. And two couples said they ended up being transformed in ways they had not expected. Deborah Gar Reichman, Shelley Curnow. After their first child was born, Deborah Gar Reichman and Shelley Curnow were determined to balance being parents with their busy social lives. Art openings? Reichman said.
And then, inthe second child came, and goodbye to all that. Hours spent at tapas restaurants were forfeited. Uploading videos of their children on YouTube became their new extracurricular sport. Reichman, 41, and Ms. Curnow, 44, have lived in the same square-foot apartment in Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn, since They have a good deal, too.
Reichman produces TV promos and Ms. Curnow is a systems developer. They started dating in the late s and got engaged on the dance floor of a TriBeCa nightclub in In fact, on a save-the-date invitation, they drew up a timeline of relationship milestones their first date, adopting a dogand joked that their marriage would finally be legal in Turns out, their wedding date fell on the first weekend that same-sex marriage was legal in Massachusetts.
If you wish, we can mail your change the date cards directly to your guests on your behalf so you don't have to leave your home to notify your guests of your date change. We also recommend using one of our free wedding websites to spread the word of any other adjustments to your wedding plans.
Announce your grad in style. We offer a wide variety of announcements and invitations, each customizable in your unique school colors. Buy your invitation and matching thank you cards at the same time and never forget to send thank yous. A unique business card can make an unforgettable first impression. Basic Invite offers hundreds of business card designs, including our one-of-a-kind clear business cards. Our mobile-friendly websites make sharing all of the details of your wedding a breeze.
Collect mailing addresses, manage your RSVPs, and share all of the important details your guests will need on a single, easy to use site. Planning a commitment ceremony or civil union ceremony but need help with the invitation wording etiquette? Below are examples of same-sex wording examples for you to use and draw inspiration from to come up with the perfect wording for your invitations for your special day.
Shop our wedding invitations collection, all of which can be adapted for a same-sex wedding. Our invitations can be fully personalized to your liking. Together with their families John Henderson And Michael Avery Request the pleasure of your company at the celebration of their marriage. Build your own color theme. Use trendy colors in unlimited combinations to make your card as unique as you are. Free Peel and Seal Envelopes included with most card orders.
Forgot Your Password?Arundhati Katju \u0026 Menaka Guruswamy On Same Sex Marriage, Living Life Openly \u0026 More - TIME 100 - TIME
Forgot Password. Login Submit. Create Account. Close Save changes. Find out more about how we are handling Covid Use code: 15FF Basic Invite. Did Your Wedding Date Change? Graduation Announcements Announce your grad in style. Clear Business Cards A unique business card can make an unforgettable first impression.
Free Wedding Websites Our mobile-friendly websites make sharing all of the details of your wedding a breeze. Search: Search. Celebration of Marriage Together with their families John Henderson And Michael Avery Request the pleasure of your company at the celebration of their marriage Basic Invite Difference Build your own color theme. Instant previews allow you to adjust your card until it is just right.When same-sex couples come to our office, the first thing I try to do is steer them away from having an out-of-the-book wedding.
For symbolic gestures, we want to come up with a unique plan for the couple and find meaning within their relationship that we can apply to their wedding ceremony.
Often we can do this through ceremony enhancements. These are rituals that you can participate in during your wedding that help symbolize the blending of two lives. Brides Joan and Andrea completed a unity painting during their wedding ceremony. Unity Painting.
If you consider your relationship young at heart and fun-loving then the unity painting ceremony is perfect for you, but it might also take you back to art class. The unity painting starts with a blank canvas and two cups filled with different colors of paint in each. During the ceremony the couple takes their color and pours the paint over the canvas at the same time allowing the colors to blend and mix over the canvas naturally. There will be places where the colors blend and mix flowing together to create a new color representing a new life together.
Wine Blending. As you might have guessed, the wine-blending ceremony enhancement involves a bottle of wine and one or two glasses. During a moment in the ceremony the bottle is uncorked and blessed by the officiant, then poured into a glass and handed to the couple.
The couple take a drink together if using two glasses or sip from the same glass. As you take a drink the officiant makes a statement about how marriage is like wine, it ripens with age, which makes this ritual that much more meaningful. Think about how nicely this could fit into a vineyard wedding.
Reverse Unity Candle. An alternative to the traditional unity lighting ceremony, the reverse unity candle ritual gives a couple the opportunity to involve all of their invited guests to participate in the ceremony.
The Same-Sex Wedding Guide All LGBTQ Couples Need
This ritual requires that everyone present receive a candle make adjustments for larger affairs and starts with the couple lighting the main unity candle and then passing the flame along to two members of your wedding party who continue passing the flame down the pews until the whole room turns into a candle-lit heaven!
Love-Letter Ceremony. The love-letter ceremony involves the marrying couple writing letters to each other and listing all the reasons why they fell in love. The letters are then sealed and placed in a box along with a bottle of wine to be opened either on a set anniversary date. On the set date, the couple opens the box and reads the letters to one another and toast to the marriage.
Then they can choose to write new letters and start the cycle over. Hand-Washing Ceremony. The hand-washing ceremony is a very symbolic observance. It is meant to symbolize a cleansing of all the faults of the couple that were committed as singles, and presenting them with a clean, fresh start as a married couple.
Once the hands have been washed, often the hands are then blessed and then the couple proceeds to declare their vows. Photo: tworingsweddingofficiant. Gay-Friendly Honeymoons and Travel Destinations. Ireland Votes Yes for Marriage Equality.
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Username or Email Address. Remember Me. Your Equally Wed. Chanda Daniels5 years ago 0 3 min read. Tags hand-washing LGBTQ weddings love love letters same-sex couples unique wedding ideas unity painting wine. Marriage Equality NewsNews. Chanda Daniels. Leave a Reply Cancel reply You must be logged in to post a comment.Congratulations North Carolina! I will, of course, be honored to officiate your legal marriage ceremony. I believe that there is no difference between same-sex marriage ceremonies and straight marriage ceremonies.
A marriage ceremony is a marriage ceremony and love is love, is love. Y our ceremony will be a unique opportunity to create a meaningful, profound and life-changing bond between you; establishing a sense of permanence and stability. It is a public declaration of life-long cvommitment, love and dedication between two people. It is also a great opportunity to celebrate your love with a big party!
I understand that for many couples who never dreamed they could marry, they simply do not know how to begin. It is a public declaration of life-long commitment, love and dedication between two people. Q: How do you create your same gender ceremony? Your partnership can be reflected in every aspect of the ceremony — from the clothing you wear, the spoken words, and the location you choose to celebrate.
I have been conducting ceremonies for couples of all lifestyles for 25 years. I invite you to sit with me, that I may learn your personal story; collaborate with you to create your ceremony, review, rehearse and officiate on the big day.
You can have one or both of your parents or any special person in your life walk you down the aisle. You may choose to have your guests pledge their support by expressing their love and happiness for your union. Symbolic Rituals : You may borrow any and all marriage rituals and make them uniquely your own.
It is for those who simply do not wish to legally marry for personal reasons. It is a joyous arena for couples that want their commitment to each other to be recognized.
There are no legal benefits and your decision to have a ceremony does not involve any government. A beautiful, personalized commemorative certificate signed by witnesses of your choice and me, your officiant, will be my gift to you; tangible evidence of this special event. Goodridge V. Department of Public Health. Marraige is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society.Linney Breaux's in Tahlequah is one of several restaurants that have increased their outdoor seating availability due to the COVID pandemic.
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Stephanie W Photography. Still, couples planning same-sex weddings might want gender-specific advice and inspiration for their ceremonies and receptions, which is why we're here. Whether you're thinking of a simple elopement or a grand affair; whether your wedding aesthetic tastes veer more moody or more rustic; whether you'll have a dozen wedding attendants or none, we've got you. Pictures by Katie. A same-sex wedding usually starts with a heartfelt same-sex wedding proposal.
For many gay and lesbian couples, there isn't a blueprint for how to propose, since you may be the first same-sex couple you know to get married.
If you have a million and one questions about how to propose to your boyfrien d as a dude or how to propose as a girlthat's totally normal. When it comes to same-sex wedding planning, here are the big topics you'll need to clear off on as a couple:.
The question of whether you want to "come out" to your wedding vendors as a same-sex couple or a couple with one or two trans people might arise as you're searching for the perfect vendors.
The answer is ultimately up to you two, but you may consider being upfront with a wedding vendor when gender is a big part of their service offering.
Cari Courtright Photography. Here's the fun part! You get to plan the ceremony and reception that best fits you as a couple. You'll definitely want to think about these elements of your wedding day:.
While planning your LGBTQ wedding may be as mundane as any other couple planning a wedding, you might run into a few rocky moments when it comes to navigating family, friends and guests. Here are some of the issues you might encounter and how to handle them :. Log in Join now. By Whitney Teal April 3, Saved Save. Same-sex weddings closely mirror opposite-sex weddings in most ways, but there are some extra steps for many couples.
Scan this same-sex wedding planning guide before you begin envisioning your special day. Here are some of the most common proposal and engagement conundrums: Do I need an engagement ring to propose? You don't need anything to propose, but many want to give their SO a physical token of their affection, so if rings aren't your love's thing, you could consider a nice watch, monogrammed cufflinks or another memento. I want to pick a ring, but don't know where to start.
Join the club! Engagement rings come in many different metals with just as many settings and stone choices. Jessika Feltz Photography Wedding Planning Timeline When it comes to same-sex wedding planning, here are the big topics you'll need to clear off on as a couple: Determining your total budget Picking a wedding date Creating a guest list Choosing the perfect wedding venue Selecting a wedding photographer and videographer Filling out your vendor team with catering, a wedding planner, florists, cake designer, transportation and other services.
Cari Courtright Photography Same-sex wedding ceremonies and receptions Here's the fun part! You'll definitely want to think about these elements of your wedding day: Gender-neutral ceremony readings The rules to writing your own same-sex wedding vows Love songs for same-sex couples Gay wedding attire inspiration Wedding dress shopping as a trans bride Subtle ways to showcase your LGBTQ pride on your wedding day Cari Courtright Photography Friends, family and guests at your same-sex wedding While planning your LGBTQ wedding may be as mundane as any other couple planning a wedding, you might run into a few rocky moments when it comes to navigating family, friends and guests.
Here are some of the issues you might encounter and how to handle them : How to handle two mother-of-the-brides How to have a bridesman or a groomswoman What to do if your parents won't attend your wedding Cool ideas for a couples wedding shower Answers to awkward questions your friends or family might have about your LGBTQ wedding.
Wedding Ceremony. Wedding Reception. Wedding Services. Wedding Fashion.
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